Man Slammed for Expecting Sister To Pay for Girlfriend’s Gluten-Free Pizza
November 28, 2024
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The internet has rallied around a woman for her decision not to pay for her younger brother’s girlfriend’s gluten-free pizza during a wake.
Reddit user BeigeSugar, a 48-year-old woman, shared her story in the thread “AITAH [Am I The A******]” where it received over 11,000 upvotes and sparked widespread discussion.
In her post, the woman explained how the family was grieving the loss of their 46-year-old brother and organized a celebration of his life at a pub. She generously ordered 10–12 pizzas, including a gluten-free option specifically for her younger brother’s girlfriend.
“Soon after, 26 [her younger brother] orders another gluten-free pizza with different toppings and tells them to put it on my bill,” she wrote. “I don’t have much money and didn’t think it was cool for him to add another $20 without saying something to me.”
The OP also shared how her brother and his girlfriend’s actions during their other brother’s hospitalization contributed to her frustration.
When their brother was in the hospital, the younger brother and his girlfriend would often come and go bringing Starbucks and Culvers for some family members, but not for his sisters, she noted.
When she refused to pay for the extra pizza, her younger brother became upset.
“I told him that the second $20 gluten-free pizza was his responsibility and asked the server to take it off my bill. He got angry, shoved me out of the way to pay, and stormed out. We haven’t spoken since because he says I disrespected his girlfriend. AITAH?” she asked.
Stock image of a man and woman arguing. The internet rallied in support of the older sister for refusing to pay for a second pizza for her brother’s girlfriend. Stock image of a man and woman arguing. The internet rallied in support of the older sister for refusing to pay for a second pizza for her brother’s girlfriend. Liubomyr Vorona/iStock / Getty Images Plus
Experts Weigh In
Braquelle Murphy, a psychotherapist and founder of Dazed Therapy, told Newsweek: “There can be so many complex emotions coming up in the aftermath of someone passing away. It sounded like the 48-year-old female had and knew her financial limits and wanted to have boundaries around it. We’re all entitled to boundaries.”
Rachel Marmor, a licensed mental-health counselor and chief wellness officer at the Practical Application of Intimate Relationship Skills Foundation, highlighted the layers of grief and tension underlying the conflict to Newsweek.
“Grief often amplifies emotions, making minor incidents feel far more significant. For the OP, the younger brother’s actions—such as the Starbucks/Culvers exclusion during their time at the hospital—created a sense of being sidelined, and these feelings likely resurfaced at the celebration of life.”
Marmor added that for the younger brother, the refusal to cover the second pizza might have felt like a slight against his girlfriend, intensifying his frustration.
“At its core, the dispute is about more than just pizza or financial boundaries. It highlights a deeper misalignment of expectations and communication,” Marmor explained.
She suggested that acknowledging their shared grief could open the door to a calm conversation focused on mutual understanding.
Both siblings need to approach the situation with empathy, recognizing how grief can influence emotions. If direct communication remains difficult, involving a neutral mediator or even seeking family therapy could help rebuild trust and mend their relationship.
Reddit Reacts
The Reddit community overwhelmingly sided with the OP, defending her decision to set financial boundaries.
“NTA [Not the A******]. I have a gluten-free diet, and if someone went out of their way to get me a gluten-free pizza, I’d be so touched and grateful!” commented virgo_qween.
Another user questioned the situation: “So did she eat the one pizza and wanted more, or did others eat some too? I agree, your brother or the GF should have paid for the second one!”
“Any reason why your brother wasn’t splitting the full bill for the celebration of life? NTA,” another chimed in.
Newsweek reached out to u/BeigeSugar for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.
Newsweek‘s “What Should I Do?” offers expert advice to readers. If you have a personal dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice on relationships, family, friends, money and work and your story could be featured on WSID at Newsweek.
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